chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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