That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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