I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Shitshow foam night was such a success
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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