I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
