This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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