either way he was missing a nipple.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
