after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
