You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
