just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize