My brain says no but my pants say off.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
