My boss' voice literally gives me gas
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
