The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize