Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
