you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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