...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
