Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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