Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
