Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
