It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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