Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
