I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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