You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
