eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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