im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
