I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..