I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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