Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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