News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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