You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
