i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
