Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+02): View more from

Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies

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(314): View more from Missouri

we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.

(1-314): View more from Missouri

i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is

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(415): View more from California

How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?

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(904): View more from Florida

she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(702): View more from Nevada

We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.

(781): View more from Massachusetts

Fear?

(617): View more from Massachusetts

FEAR.

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(845): View more from New York

I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.

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