bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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