apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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