dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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