Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
