i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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