Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I'm having to shit out rocks
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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