do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
