This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
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she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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