ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize