My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
