we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
