Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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