we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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