I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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