I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
