i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
