I could make wine with my vomit
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
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i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
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Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize