Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize