They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
