Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
